One way to understanding how a person operates while in the cycle of sex addiction is to look through the lens of Transactional Analysis, which is a theory of psychology that considers the ego states that we operate from when we interact with ourselves, others, and the world. Those ego states include Parent, Adult, and [...]
When approaching recovery from sex addiction, why is it important to work with a professional who specializes in this area? One of the reasons is the knowledge that compulsive sexual behaviors are often less a product of sexual arousal, and more of an attempt to cope with unattended shame or trauma. With that understanding, those [...]
My Partner Has a Sexual/Pornography Addiction What Does This Mean For Me? One of the most difficult things to deal with is watching someone you love suffer and struggle with painful life experiences. Whether it is your partner, your child, your parent or your best friend. Being a support for someone who is struggling is [...]
The 12 step community gets it right. The step work and sponsorship ARE the program. I know of many people who attend 12 step recovery meetings but never dig into the step work. There are probably as many reasons as there are people who attend but don't enter into sponsorship. I'd like to suggest a [...]
Much of American culture values being individualistic, which can discourage having a reliance or dependence on others. You have probably heard someone say “I had to do it myself”, when describing how he or she accomplished something. On further examination, most stories like this would likely reveal at least one support person who helped in [...]
In this multi-part series for the partners of sex addicts we've taken a look at the traumas that often accompany the discovery of your partner's sex addiction and during the early stages of recovery. In this post we'll outline some suggestions for keeping yourself safe during these days of early recovery. First a few words [...]
In this 3rd part of the series for the partners of sex addicts, we'll address some of the forms of trauma that many of our clients who are partners of sex addicts experience. Realize that not all of these forms of trauma apply to everyone. Our clients usually report more than one form of trauma [...]
Imagine a highly addictive drug that is available 24 hours a day, offered for free in large quantities in the comfort of your own home, and injected just by viewing it. For anyone who understands addiction, it is easy to understand how internet pornography is a perfect recipe for compulsive use.
Sex addiction can be understood in many ways. In this post we look at sex addiction through attachment theory and understanding some of the motivations for acting out behaviors.